When you first meet another person that you may be interested in dating further, a natural tendency comes up to want to tell the other person so many positive things about yourself, to talk about your great career, your great apartment, your amazing music abilities, and your great group of friends. My advice: Just stop.  More likely than not, you are hurting, rather than helping your chances for love. There are many reasons why trying to impress your date doesn’t work:

1. You are destroying the air of mystery- Everyone loves a good puzzle and a good mystery. People love discovering things for themselves, so give them that opportunity by unveiling all those amazing aspects of yourself slowly. Remember, always have something new to show on each date and you’ll have your love interest hooked in no time.

2. You risk the chance that you will come off as a braggart and narcissist- It’s great that you have a lot going for you, but appearing to be too conceited will throw all of your positive traits through a negative filter.

3. You run the risk of appearing to be too eager- Nothing kills attraction more than neediness.  Anytime you have the urge to ramble on about all the great stuff about you, pause for a moment and consider whether or not doing so would make you seem too eager to please.

4. People are less likely to believe someone’s self-assessment. In other words, if your friend were to tell your date that you were a great guy, it would be more believable than if you did so yourself. For example, demonstrating that you are a skillful guitar player is obviously more believable than telling someone that you are. By showing, rather than telling, you basically bypass anyone’s skepticism by allowing them to make their own conclusions.

Remember, even though you have a lot to offer, doesn’t mean you can bombard a new date with all of your amazing traits. If you don’t want to alienate your date, make sure to slowly show your best qualities over time, rather than come across as being overeager to tell them everything all at once.