As a student of human psychology, especially intimate human relations, I’ve kept my ear to the ground to be able to learn any new theory, concept or technique in human psychology that would give me a more complete understanding of the human animal. Along those lines, and of utmost interest to me when I was single, were any developments in the area of romance and seduction. Yes, I won’t deny I tried most pickup techniques I read about online- some worked, most were awful. In fact, I don’t recommend most of the stuff one can find online about picking up girls, because most of it will only work if you are already a desirable male, and if you’re not, it will just end up as a disaster. The true qualities that attract women such as confidence, congruency, authenticity, and charm can’t be picked up through an ebook or a weekend “boot camp.” 

Anyways, I recently read about a new opener called “The Apocalypse Opener” that supposedly is the elixir for all sex-deprived geeks. Although based on the firm fundamental of showing dominance and confidence, once again it will be a disaster in the hands of a nervous guy, and will probably most likely only work with the most drunken girl in the bar even if done properly.  Basically, the premise is to do away with all of the fluff of small talk when meeting a girl, and just boldly ask her to bed as soon as you approach.  Apparently, if done with purpose, this technique will so stun the target that she will have no choice but capitulate to your every desires. Although it is probably true that in the back of her mind, she may be turned on by your boldness (since many  women do have fantasies about being “taken” or “manhandled” by a desirable guy), her social wiring will undoubtedly create a backlash that will make her feel dirty for feeling that way, and obviously, that backlash will be taken out on you. Also, it may be wise to be aware of your circumstances in case any of her male friends may be in the vicinity and have a disliking to what you said.  So, unless you don’t mind having people get furious at you, slap you, throw drinks at you or worse… I would use extreme caution.

Finally, has anyone ever even used this opener? Except for a few online anecdotal claims, I still have not met anyone who has had any kind of veriable success with this technique. Anyone?

So how does the Apocalypse Opener actually go? What are the lines exactly? I’m glad you asked….

The Apocalypse Opener…..

Here it is, lads:

And that’s the Apocalypse opener. You don’t ‘build rapport.’ You don’t ‘elicit values.’ You don’t ‘kino escalate.’ You don’t even ask her fucking NAME. You ask if she wants to sleep with you in the THIRD SENTENCE, hold the line, and reap the whirlwind.